She had/has every right to feel what she is feeling. And I am feeling so many emotions right now for someone I hardly knew (but well enough to know what kind of person he was). His mom runs a bracelet boutique and it’s where I been getting all my daughters bracelets since she’s been born . Maybe if I weren’t so nervous with people maybe if I weren’t so new to the friend group. There was no one to the right of me and just blank walls so I’m 99% sure he was looking at me. But then my best friend pulled up and I started talking to her instead. Perhaps you had held out hope of one day having a relationship with the person and now that they have died you’re grieving the loss of that dream. someone help, Brown's Momma  November 2, 2019 at 11:14 pm Reply. Sure, the memories from those people help and I have them share them with me when I really miss my dad, but it’s still defeating that I don’t have my own. My husband just found out that someone he knew in Highschool, had classes with, and did plays with, but didn’t hang out with outside of school just died. She had me at 17, and after a downward spiral with drugs and depression she took her life at only 21. I went to the same college as him and yet he wasn’t at my graduation. His funeral is next week, and I think I’m going to go. She was only 3. My father died in a car accident when I was 6 years old. It wasn’t until last year I finally told myself my feelings and emotions are valid, and it was okay for me to feel how I felt. Today, I found out he finally did what he set out to do. He should still be here. I don't think he would go into the other stuff because you know, I'm just barely considered a minor by my country's laws. Recently, my daughter in law died of breast cancer leaving behind 3 children, ages 6, 4 and 1. I am feeling really sad as i write this, i can’t even ask my mom about the where about of my father, my family is too conserved i have never dared to even ask about him, am really thankful for my mom caz she raised me single handedly and gave me education, dressed me and fed me she has always been there for me. She was such a beautiful soul and taken to soon. But he always sends me music and has even shared a few personal things with me. The phrase "You don't even know me" for whatever it means, sounds condescending. From the pictures, my mom was young, vibrant and full of hopes and dreams. A 13 year old boy named Diego was punched by his bullies and ultimately died as a result. I’m grieving the death of Leandro Felix Guzman known as junior from the Bronx butchered by a gang outside a bodega June 20 th 2018 .I am absolutely traumatized depressed and have developed ptsd I did t know junior but his murder was publisized on Instagram for the whole world to see .He resembled my older son born in November and being same age .He was only 15 and was mistaken for another opposing gang member.I can never forget this sweet angel taken sooo brutally he will forever be in my heart I can never forget him.May he rest I. Our last encounter almost caused me to miscarry and I knew I had to get out of there. The older ones are waiting for us to become older so we can be their strength!! and it is haunting me beyond words. The parents and grandparents and others don’t have the huge cache of memories to draw upon that other relationships that are years or decades long have. am not even sure if he is still alive or dead, and if he is alive if he even thinks of me or remember if he has a daughter somewhere. Now he’s gone. Anyways, I was fine until a couple days ago but then I’ve been feeling like my depression is coming back because I couldn’t possibly be grieving for someone I wasn’t really that close to…could I? Life seems impossible now and all of my memories of my girl are the sad and filled with unbearable pain. he was so sweet and innocent and it’s not fair . I never met the child or her parents – I only knew her through the blog the parents shared to catalog her final journey. Stacy  August 12, 2020 at 11:54 am Reply. I was angry and resented her for a while, but now i realize there was nothing to forgive and she deserves to be at peace. I can’t stop seeing his sweet innocent smile and wish I was there to protect him. I was calling and so was he…AND every time I see him, it can be North, south, east or west weekend or weekday our paths just keep crossing, but I grieve…, am grieving, have good and bad days… Happy when it rains, sad when it rains, sad on sunny days, etc, I go through the 4 of the 5 stages of grief every time……. I keep saying, why did that second boy have to hit him? My grandad was wealthy and left my moms guardians money and land to care for my mom. What does darling mean? I know she struggles with filling the empty spaces. Thank you for this post, it has helped me understand I’m not crazy and that it’s okay to grieve her even if the friendship was short with only one vivid memory. With all that I have been through, all I have seen in my life, Diego’s death has left me broken. IsabelleS  October 19, 2020 at 11:12 am Reply. So far from his path that I barely see the promise of glory Can this be him, this Hellboy? So focusing on feelings isn’t helpful. He was unable to meet her till she was 3yo for many reasons but would call and read to her over the phone and would video chat as often as his work schedule would allow. He gave me the news that my bestie died 10 years ago from being hit by a semi and his brother a week later added it was deliberate, that he had a lot of issues which I never saw in our 5 years together in Middle School and High School. So, I have lots of severed relationships with my family, people I saw when I was little, then never saw again. I am sad at what could have been, but angry at what SHOULD have been. I thought when my adopted mother had passed that her and I would have the opportunity to really figure us out, for me to get answers. I hold my kids closely every night and wonder how a parent could do this to their own child. I went into a funk that persists 3 months later. I have a friend who planned out her sister’s entire baby shower. and how do you say good bye to somebody you never got the chance to say hello to. International Flights  January 27, 2020 at 10:33 pm Reply. Greetings! I wish I had gone for coffee and spent some time with him, when he asked. He was 10 years older than me, so I only ever knew him as someone a lot older than me. It’s been such a struggle as they were not as close as both of them would have liked. He was a publisher and my mom does not understand the truth. This is a loss to us. But I feel this deep connection with him for some reason. I have cried everyday and every night thinking about this poor boy and what I would have done to save him if i could go back in time knowing what i know now. This is the most accurate gay test you will ever take. The way he stood in the video when confronted, how he was nervous and scared, I keep replaying it. So to the author of this article thank you from the bottom my heart for giving me a sense of peace. Here’s a list of 42 signs to help you understand if a girl likes Perhaps he is taken or you once slept with him on a one night stand. And I begin to tear up all over again as I post this. He had 3 sons and I know it had to have been so hard for him to leave them when they were still children and it makes me cry to think how sad he must have been. He promised to call me when he got back to town but he never did and I let it go. #1, "You don't even know me" could mean any number of things depending on the context. I would be worried that even though it wasn’t based on reality, it could happen to me. I happen to be working in this industry. Most of the time U see ppl maybe once or twice after you part at the store, etc. Learn more. Why would anyone want to hit someone who is clearly afraid of them? My heart hurts every night I lay down and it’s difficult to sleep. A. thou hast Psalm 139:23 Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: Psalm 11:4,5 The LORD is in his holy temple, the LORD'S throne is in heaven: his eyes behold, his eyelids try, the children of men… But that’s not the case. I just wanna say Diego rest in heavenly Peace. Vickie Johnston  December 3, 2019 at 7:41 am Reply, Thank you so much for this help! So I didn’t go. Oh my gosh, I am so grateful for your response! Sometimes I feel like he’s haunting me and I’m feeling his pain, if that makes any sense, it’s like I can feel what he was feeling. An endless continuation of possibilities of how to help or prevent such a tragedy. I’ve felt very alone and I haven’t been able to tell anyone because I thought it was strange, in a way, that I was still grieving for someone I didn’t really know so long after the death. This article helped put things into perspective I had to reach out of this was normal. 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